Isn't It Okay??

I really do love the book of Job.  In chapter 4, we find the 'friend', Eliphaz, advising Job with the following words:

   "In the past, you've encouraged many a troubled soul to trust in God. . . . your words have strengthened the fallen, you steadied those who wavered.  But now, when trouble strikes, you faint and are broken.  Does your reverence for God give you no confidence?"

Reading these words, I realize that I don't need a friend like Eliphaz to say them to me . . .  I say them to myself:     a Christian . . .  faith in the Almighty God . . . all things work together . . . rejoice always . . . only believe . . .  joy in the morning . . . have faith and pray . . . But when trouble strikes, I'm terrified and broken!  Where is my faith, the confidence that comes from my reverence for God?

Sometimes a great fear roars up within me that another loss will strike my family. . . and the grief will be devastating.  I recently shared this fear with a small group of hospital chaplains, and one responded with, "but isn't it okay to fall apart at something as horrific as losing a child?"  Wow.  Humbling.  Yes.

So, then, how shall I live?
     Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.  Matt 5:4
     Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.  Romans 12:15
     My eyes are dim with grief.  I call to you, Lord, every day.  Psalm 88:9
     Even in laughter, the heart may ache.  Proverbs 14:13
     In all this you rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer
                  grief in all kinds of trials. 1 Peter 1:6

Yes, it's okay to grieve.  Maybe, through the grief, we learn.